Not Quite Moving On

So the last time--other than yesterday's post--I confided in someone about my fears and doubts concerning death etc, the response was something like this, "Oh, no, when you die, it will be amazing, angels will come to meet you"  yada yada.  I felt admonished.  Not that I wouldn't love to have the confidence of my friend but I look at the crucifix, hear the call to "follow me" and, well, I don't expect it to be all floating off to Paradise.
However, after writing my post yesterday afternoon, our family went to a neighbor's house for dinner and a presentation by a group called "America Needs Fatima".  After an enlightening talk and slide show, we said a rosary together and, before we left, I bought a few books including one called The Book of Confidence by Father Thomas de Saint-Laurent.   Back at home, I read this:

" Like the apostle, some souls have this terror (their sinfulness before God).  They feel their sinfulness and their misery so keenly that they scarcely dare approach Him Who is Holiness itself.  To them it seems that the all-holy God must experience revulsion upon inclining Himself toward them.  This unhappy impression hampers their interior life and at times paralyses it completely.  How mistaken are these souls!  Immediately, Jesus approached the frightened Apostle and said to him, "Fear not,"  and made him rise.  You also, Christians, you who have received so many proofs of His love, fear not!"


Sounds a lot like a direct response to my last post.  The book is about developing the virtue of confidence regarding God and His promises to me--confidence being a kind of fortified hope or Super-Hope.  It is a new idea for me and I am excited to read about and work on it.

In other news, we attended Madeleine's piano recital yesterday afternoon.  She played Billy Joel's "Lullabye" and sang "Journey to the Past" from Anastasia.  I love Billy Joel's song.  It was on one of Madeleine's own lullabye CDs when she was a wee babe and, well, it makes me cry.  Pretty much every time she plays it (I've been crying a lot lately).  Madeleine was a harsh critic of her own performance but I'm her Mama and I think she's--well, a chip off the ole' block.  But better.  I'm so proud.

A few photos from last night:

 Ella at the recital--Yay Christmas!

 Her Christmas wish

Madeleine took this one

We have video of Madeleine's performance that I may post later.  Probably not though so you'll have to take my word for it.  She rocked the house.

20 more!