Beloved of God

 An appropriate topic for Sunday.  I thought I'd give you the background on the first line of our mission statement.  It is quoted from the works of Henry Nouwen (my new best friend).  He uses the word "beloved" over and over when referring to his relationship to God, a word borrowed from the Gospels about Jesus' baptism and transfiguration when God said, "This is my beloved Son".  Jesus in turn told His disciples, "As the father has loved me, so I have loved you" (JN 15:9).  Therefore we, like Jesus, are God's beloveds.

Beloved of God.  The idea has been transformational for me.  When I hear the word beloved, I feel a warm, bright glow or even arms wrapped around me, holding and cherishing me.  Beloved is a word for mothers and babies, lovers and bosom friends.  Those are all relationships that I can picture and understand and to use the same word for the way that God relates to me and my family brings Him so close to us.

But to look at the word another way--"be loved".  A command.  As I think of my own spiritual journey, I recognize that allowing myself to truly "be loved" by another person or even God has been, at times, a difficult thing.  Often, there are many parts of me that I want to clean up or fix in order to be loved.  So many in fact, that the list is never ending.  Other times, I have way too much on my to do list to find the time to passively "be loved".  There have been times in recent years though when I have been incapable of any forward progress or of making any effort on my own behalf.  I have been at the proverbial bottom of the barrel.  And there, in the dark, is where I learned the most about being loved.  Because I have known love when I have been the least "worthy" of it--at least in the eyes of the world--I now trust and believe in it in a way I never did before.  So when I say that I am beloved today, right now, as I am, I am stating a fact.  Not just for me.  For all of us.

The application of all of this is that seeing Chris and our sweet girls as God's beloveds changes the way I interact with them.  They do not belong to me but they were entrusted to me as a great gift.  He expects me to take good care of them.  I do not always remember to treat them as beloveds but I want to.


So, the first line of the mission statement was my contribution.  Our other possible choices were "The Doyle Family is very blessed" and "The Doyle Family is grateful" both of which were also good.  We were looking for something up front that expressed our relationship to God.  The final selection* came down to the fact that I want to remind the girls often of how precious they are to God and to us.  I want to remember that my dear husband is first beloved of God and then, His gift to me.  I want to teach the girls to ask themselves how God's beloved would behave in a given situation.  I am hopeful that they will remind themselves that their family, friends and even strangers are also beloved of God and treat them accordingly.  When they falter, I hope they remember who they are and quickly return to God's embrace.

Lofty goals these but, to repeat an oft quoted phrase--with my family--my life's work--I always try to "shoot for the moon....if I miss, I'll be among the stars".

*and Chris got his pink gorilla so it was all good.


Happy New Week everyone!
Love, Alice

Mission Possible

So, before I dive into all of the details of our 3 day adventure in the wild (HA), I'm going to start with the highlight of the trip for me.  For years now, Chris and I have talked about writing a family mission statement.  I think we were exposed to the idea by Stephen Covey as well as some of his colleagues.
In fact, when we first moved to Kingwood, we got up early over several weekends and put together a wonderful mission statement for our marriage.  It's a bit long so I won't post it here but I highly encourage you to write one if you are married and feel motivated.  It brought us together in a completely new way as we examined the "whys" and "fors" of our union.
In talking with the other families about the activities for the camping weekend, Chris and I made a command decision and said that our family would be spending part of Saturday afternoon working on a mission statement and a coat of arms.  To prepare, I gathered paper and markers and printed out a how-to-guide from the internet.  There were many available but the one I chose seemed accessible and short enough to achieve the goal in the brief time we had.
The girls were surprisingly enthusiastic considering that their friends would be swimming while we were crafting.  We promised to be efficient and join the others as soon as we finished.  We drove to a scenic spot by the lake and sat around a picnic table.  We talked about the importance of knowing where we are headed in life and I think we even mentioned Chik Fil A, one of our all times favorites, as an example of a company with a mission statement that sets it apart.
The first step in my guide had us throwing out adjectives to describe our family.  Six of us accomplished that as Ella snoozed through the whole process.  I think Sophie threw out "kissy" as her adjective.  For step two, we divided into pairs and went off on our own to come up with sentences about our family including descriptions, traditions, quotes and inside jokes.  Afterward, we came back together and shared.  Chris and I then worked together to summarize what we had and added a few things that were essential to us.  The whole process took less than an hour and this is what we came up with:

The Doyle Family is beloved of God.  We strive to be holy by practicing the Catholic faith handed on to us.  We support each other in developing our particular gifts and growing in virtue.  We value respect, honor and obedience* in our relationships with one another.  We are welcoming and generous to those whose paths cross ours even if one happens to be....a pink gorilla**.

*These have been our three core family values that Chris has emphasized with all the girls.
**If you are not familiar with the pink gorilla, Chris would be happy to tell you about him sometime.

So the question is--now that we have this mission statement, what will we do with it?  Well, for starters, hang it in a prominent place in our home where we will see and remember it.  We plan to learn it and give a copy to the girls for their wallets.  And we will have to re-visit it occasionally to be sure it is still relevant and to update it as needed--and I would really like to find a way to include Sophie's "kissy"!

Whenever we do revisit the mission statement, Ella will have to add her two cents.

She was in this position all afternoon.

I hope your weekend is peaceful.

See you here next time.

Intermission

 Time out from serious posts for a brief intermission.  Following are a few of the many photos I took over the weekend on our very first in seven years camp out!  Despite the fact that we had this planned for about six months (or I should say our neighbors and dear friends had it planned), I hadn't mentioned it to the two people I talk to the most.  Which may be an indication of my trepidation.  We did indeed survive the weekend and I am not totally opposed to trying it again so...success (I think).

YMCA anyone?

We had a fire going the entire weekend.

It was the kids' favorite part.

Lights out.

Goodnight y'all!

More on Blindness

In thinking about my post on John's gospel about the blind man, it occurred to me that I have always heard it explained as a story about going from blindness to sight and darkness to light.  In my opinion though, it is just as importantly an example of Jesus acting as the Good Shepherd.  In most of the stories about Jesus' miracles of healing, the afflicted person or his friend, family member or boss seeks Jesus out.  In the case of the blind man, Jesus sought him out not once but twice--the first time to cure his physical blindness and the second to offer spiritual healing.  Who was this man?  We don't even know his name and yet the God of the universe took the time to seek him out and bring him home.  I don't know about you but that truly amazes me.  To quote the psalmist, "What is man that Thou art mindful of him?"  (Psalm 8:4)  Or, to paraphrase--who am I that God is mindful of me?

Henri Nouwen writes about God's initiative in dealing with us in his book The Return of the Prodigal Son.  He says:

In all three parables which Jesus tells in response to the question of why He eats with sinners, he puts the emphasis on God's initiative.  God is the shepherd who goes looking for His lost sheep.  God is the woman who lights a lamp, sweeps out the house, and searches everywhere until she has found it.  God is the father who watches and waits for His children, runs out to meet them, embraces them, begs and urges them to come home.  It might sound strange but God wants to find me as much as, if not more than, I want to find God.

I find it very easy to believe in this portrayal of God when it comes to others.  I have always found it very easy to identify likable and admirable traits in almost everyone I meet.  So I can see why God would make the effort with them.  It's a bit different when it comes to myself.  When I am feeling worn out and even lost, I find it difficult to believe in a God who comes in search of me.  I am much more inclined to make a list of ten things I must do to get back to the basics and reconnect with God.  The problem with that is, when I'm tired, I want to stay where I am.  I can identify with little Sophie who still tells us repeatedly on long walks, "I want you to carry me".  In fact, often, I could easily say that to God--I want you to carry me.  Please.  

Imagine it--a piggyback ride on the shoulders of God.  What incredible joy.  And that is the kind of God we serve.

Speaking of joy.  A few moments that made me smile today.  

 This was part of some game she was playing with Mia.

 I reminded her that this is not allowed (after taking the picture).

 Waiting to be rescued?

 Her assignment here was to vacuum her bedroom.

I suppose you could say she found a way to make the task more interesting.

(She did eventually vacuum it!)

And my favorite photo of the day.

Taken at Grandpa Doyle's birthday dinner.

Hasta mañana queridos amigos. 

Blindness

In my first teaching position at Walt Whitman Middle School, I met a few women who were interested in forming a book club.  Ashley, my English teacher friend, chose a novel by Portuguese Nobel prize winner Jose Saramago called Blindness.  Eager for the opportunity to discuss literature again, I bought the book and read it through almost immediately.  The book club never materialized but I will never forget that book.  It was very heavy and dark, about an epidemic of blindness, a blind society.

Because Chris is essentially on travel this week coming home only to fall, exhausted, into bed, I am going to stretch my writing muscles and focus on a few more meaty subjects.  Most of you probably visit Frodo Seven to check in on our family antics so this may be a good time for you to take a break.  If you're up for it though, I invite you to read about my thoughts on a few different topics including last Sunday's gospel, forgiveness and reconciliation and my reading of the popular book, The Giving Tree.

So, back to blindness.  Yesterday's gospel was all about blindness but before I get into that, a few introductory comments about the interpretation of scripture.  I was talking to someone recently who asked me, "Who are we to interpret scripture?"--meaning, I think, that that kind of thing should be left to the experts, the phDs.  Perhaps because I have a background in literary analysis, I have a different perspective on things.  First, the bible must be the most accessible book ever written.  If it were only meant for the elite, what would that mean about the hope of salvation of the masses?  When we read scripture, we interact with it and interpret it in a way that is unique to who we are.  What makes a reading good or faulty has much more to do with whether or not it is based in the text than who does the reading.  When we venture off into the world of wishful thinking or creative writing, saying more what we hope a text means than quoting what it actually says, we are no longer dealing in reality and therefore our interpretation lacks merit--that's true of a phD as well as an average Joe.

That said, yesterday's gospel was John 9:1-41.  I encourage you to read it before reading my comments.  

So, here's the scene-- there's a man who has been blind from birth sitting by the road where Jesus and the disciples are traveling.  Seeing the man, the disciples ask Jesus about the sin that caused the man's affliction.  Later in the passage after he's been healed, the pharisees say to the man, "you were born totally in sin and are you trying to teach us?"--an indication that the disciples' thinking isn't so far off from that of the pharisees at least initially.  Jesus makes it clear that that kind of thinking is not God's thinking and says that the man's blindness "is so that the works of God might be made visible through him."  The disciples watch as Jesus spits on the ground, makes mud, puts it on the blind man's eyes and tells him to wash.

Up to this point, the interesting thing to me is that, if we look at the whole scene, the blind man is probably "seeing" the most clearly of everyone other than Jesus.  He's been blind from birth and is considered a sinner and an outcast.  He must be dependent on others for a lot of things.  How can he possibly see himself in any way other than as abnormal, deficient and helpless?  Which is basically the condition of the whole human race since the fall of Adam.  So ironically, in God's eyes, the blind man may have been seeing more clearly than anyone, even the disciples whose question about sin implied that they themselves were somehow more righteous or whole than the man because of their own health.

So, with mud on his eyes, reminiscent of the dust from which he was made, the man washes as Jesus asked him to and can see.  And voilá--no one recognizes him.  Here he is--for the first time in his life, able to see the people he knows and loves and many deny him.  No, they say--can't be him.  

So they call his parents.  And this is my favorite part.  If you think about how short the gospels are given all that Jesus did, you have to wonder how the gospel writers chose what to include and I wonder about this story about the parents.  I've never heard a priest talk about this but when I listened to the gospel yesterday, I realized--oh wow--his parents totally threw him under the bus.  Instead of standing with their son and answering the pharisees' questions, they "were afraid of the Jews, for the Jews had already agreed that if anyone acknowledged him as the Christ he would be expelled from the synagogue"--so they said "He is of age, question him".  Of course, their son ends up being expelled himself after which Jesus seeks him out.  The man then makes an incredible declaration of faith.  He doesn't just see, he SEES.  And his parents?  The cowards who were perhaps too close to the miracle to believe it?  They were presumably still welcome in the synagogue, worshipping in blindness.  They missed their chance to truly see.  Perhaps forever.

Meditating on this gospel, I pray for courage and a simple heart that loves God above all else.  I pray for peace in our world, a peace that begins in our families and even in our own individual lives.  I pray to try to see as God does as much as is possible through this veil of tears.

Thank you for reading.  More to follow.

As Soon As Possible

Our family had a very full weekend.  I took so many photos that I may need to split them into a few posts.  For this evening though, Chris and I wound down from all of the activity by watching a movie that is on my top 10 all time favorites list.  I've probably seen it twenty times.  Rather than name it, I'll just quote my favorite line, "When you know you want to spend the rest of your life with someone, you want the rest of your life to start--as soon as possible".
Next weekend, C and I have some serious meeting time scheduled to discuss a few very important topics like--the rest of our lives.  Or something like that anyway.  Prayers most welcome.

And here, a trio of photos from the weekend to get us started:

Bye for now!  Have a great first week of April!

Warning! Remember the Date!

It's that day again.  April 1st.  I am sure Chris has a plan for me but so far, his only victim has been Madeleine.  This morning, her sisters, willing accomplices, rang the door bell and Chris went up to Madeleine's room where she was still sleeping and asked if she had made an appointment with her Geometry teacher.  Madeleine gave a sleepy, "no" and Chris asked her to please come down and see what her teacher needed.  Madeleine grumbled a bit, threw on a sweatshirt, grabbed her Geometry bag and walked down the stairs only to have the flash go off and hear her sisters say "April Fools!"  (I was the innocent bystander with the camera.)

Chris tells me I am incapable of pulling off an April Fools joke because my face is so transparent but I have a feeling that will only cause him to let his guard down and underestimate me.  I was a pretty convincing actress back in the day.  If you have any good ideas for me, please let me know.  I may declare an April Fools Weekend just to help Madeleine get even with her dear old dad!

 It's sinking in

What a great sport.

Little sisters beware!!